Cleanse Overview and Beyond

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It is time for an overview of the cleanse. I have decided to keep blogging about my relationship with food, exercise, wedding prep, and whatever fun things I decide to write about. This means I'll be keeping you updated on my post cleanse lifestyle changes.

So here's a quick overview of the cleanse (feel free to post any questions you may have, or you can contact me directly):

• Total weight lost = 8 lb. 
• Total money spent = $97 
• Difference in money spent on cleanse and money spent weekly = around $15-$20 (but I had a lot of fruit left over)

I can't really think of any other statistic-type thing that gives a good overview. I do know that I feel great. This morning when I was getting ready for work, I noticed that my clothes are looser and my skin is clearer. 

If I do the cleanse again I think that I will buy less food right off the bat. I over-bought because I was afraid of being hungry. I also think I would buy some sort of salt substitute, because I did have to put salt on my veggies throughout the cleanse.

Another change I would make is day seven. I think that I would try to do one more fruit/veggie only day rather than the soup. It was kind of a hassle, but that was partly because I was trying to travel with it.

So here's the big question...

Where do I go from here?

I still have some more weight I'd like to lose. I also want to just become "firmer" if that  makes sense. Especially after buying my wedding dress, I want my arms to be more toned as well as my tummy and legs.

I've decided to be open minded. If someone gives me a suggestion, I'm going to try it.

I'm also going to combine all of the knowledge I have about dieting and nutrition and come up with my own lifestyle change plan. Here's what I'm thinking:

• Most of the food I eat will be fruits and veggies.*
• I will eat a small portion of whole grain every other day, or maybe just 3 times a week depending on how things are going (usually this will be before 3:00 p.m.).*
• I will eat lean meats such as turkey, chicken, and lean beef.
• I will allow myself one "treat" each weekend. This will give me something to work toward each week and hopefully prevent any binging. I don't want to deprive myself, but at the same time, to lose weight and become healthier I have to learn to say no sometimes.
• I will cut out salad dressing, pretty much altogether. Lemon juice, balsamic vinegar, and a tiny bit of extra virgin olive oil is much healthier and much better for me.
• I will pick back up on on day three, level one of the 30 Day Shred.
• I will begin doing cardio and strength exercise in some way shape or form 4-5 days a week in addition to the 30 Day Shred (suggestions welcome).

I know a lot of people who are really big on healthy lifestyles say not to live by a set of "rules". But at the same time, in many ways I live my life by a set of rules. I have rules at work, rules that are biblical that I live by, rules that Jason and I have for ourselves and each other, rules when I drive, rules with how I spend my money, and probably many other aspects of life that I'm not thinking of right now.

Rules are not necessarily a bad thing. They help us live balanced and more peaceful lives.

Why shouldn't I have rules to what I put in my body and how I exercise?

If you have a good reason or reasons, please, by all means let me know. I truly am trying to be genuinely healthy.

Oh, and I am going to try to start posting recipes, so be looking for a recipe tab in the near future.

That's about it. That's where I've been over the last 10 days or so and where hoping to go over the next couple of months...and hopefully longer.

I believe I'm all caught up on my rambling...for now. Have a great Monday everyone!



*Since I am insulin resistant, my body does not process sugars (even natural sugars) in a "normal" way. I'm not trying to go "low carb" necessarily, but I honestly do not process sugars the right way, so I kind of have to do that. For the first two bullet points of "where I'm going", I'm not saying that fruits and whole wheat items have to be limited like that. But of course, if you'd like to do that, see how it works.

Absolute Perfection

This is how I felt this morning...

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I woke up this morning and looked to see what time it was. When I saw that it was a 8:00, I decided that I still technically had 30 more minutes to sleep, so I rolled back over. But then, I remembered coffee. The sooner I got up, the sooner I got coffee.

The first sip was everything I hoped it would be...and more!

Needless today, when I came to this realization, I hopped out of bed and headed downstairs. I chose Vanilla Biscotti by Folger's as my first cup of "happiness".

When I walked into the kitchen to get my coffee, I found my dad making a wonderful breakfast!

Look how precious my dad is making breakfast for his girlies. Whole new meaning to "provider".

He made turkey bacon, eggs, and sliced watermelon. I opted to just go for an egg, watermelon, and some coffee, but the smell of bacon was delightful!

Around 9:30, it was time to hit the road. We had an 11:00 appointment at David's Bridal in Pensacola, which is about an hour away. But we weren't sure where in Pensacola the store is, so we made sure to leave with plenty of time.

The view from the Destin Bridge is my favorite in the entire world. Today was perfect in many ways, but this is definitely one of them:

I'm glad that we decided to leave early, because we walked into the store at 11:01. I also spilled my coffee in the car and it got all over the back of the sundress I had on...great way to walk into a wedding gown store. I might as well introduced myself as "Clumsy".

As soon as I started looking at dresses, everything got better. My consultant's name is Joan and she's been "in the business" for over 25 years. Let me tell you, that woman knows her stuff. She guess my dress size about five minutes after she met me. Incredible...

I wish I could post a picture, but my loving and supportive fiancé does read my blog (Hey Jason!), so I cannot. I will just say that we HAD to find a dress today. I told Joan that I was walking out of the store with a dress and she sure did make that happen. We were there for two and a half hours and I tried on six dresses. I never put a dress on twice. I bought the sixth dress and knew it was "it" before I even looked at myself in a mirror. My family literally gasped as a walked out of the room (and one of the consultants did too). I felt so special and I just knew that was the reaction that I needed to get from the perfect wedding dress.

Even though I was/am on a super strict budget for my wedding, I ended up getting a designer dress that was on sale. I really don't know any designers for wedding gowns other than Vera Wang, but this guy who designed mine also designed Jackie Kennedy's and Grace Kelly's dresses. I thought that was a fun fact.

For anyone who is about to go wedding dress shopping soon, or even someday, here are a few tips.
1. Don't wear a lot, or any face make-up such as powder or foundation.
2. The shop will have all the undergarments you need. You don't need your own (I was way over prepared).
3. If you have your shoes, bring them with you! It helps so much.
4. Set a budget ahead of time.
5. Plan the appointment early. Plan to be there for a while. Don't plan it close to a mealtime.
6. Take people who will be honest with you, but who will also celebrate the experience with you.

I did a lot a little research before dress shopping today so thankfully I did all of these things. It made the trip run very smooth! It was so special and I got to ring a bell when I "said yes to the dress". When I rang the bell, everyone clapped. I truly did feel like a bride and buying the dress made it seem so much more real!

After dress shopping, we hit up Ruby Tuesday's for their salad bar.

The Garden Bar is always a good choice. 

I had a delicious salad topped with cucumber, egg, sunflower seeds, a few black olives, balsamic vinegar, and olive oil. I also had a little bit of Waldorf salad and something that resembled potato salad, but I decided not to eat the potato salad. When we got home, I fixed an afternoon coffee. It wasn't as exciting as my morning coffee today, but it still hit the spot!

By request of, well, me, we picked up some fresh red snapper from the seafood market on our way back into town. I am super picky about seafood, but I knew that fish would be a great way to ease out  of the cleanse. Since I'm picky, I usually only eat seafood if it's fresh and if it's from Destin. My dad marinaded it in this lemon pepper sauce and then grilled it.

I volunteered to make my parmesan crusted asparagus tonight. It was a big hit with my family, and I honestly think I ate too much of it. Usually, I use the sprinkle kind of parmesan, but all we had at the house was fresh shredded. It all worked out okay.

Cousin/yogurt love

After dinner we hung out with my cousin Matt. I decided to treat all of them to a yogurt. I opted for a small helping to reward myself for completing the cleanse and for finding my wedding dress.

I believe that the whole meal (and really day) has inspired my plan for realistically maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Since the cleanse is over, I have to space out my topics for posts though :) I will share my plan soon, but not tonight.

Enough rambling, it's been a perfect day and this bride-to-be is super tired.

P.S. Jason comes home tomorrow!

Day 7: The Last Hurdle

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I can totally relate with every emotion this little guy is experiencing. All day I've been carrying this track race analogy around in my mind.

For closer examination of this picture, I'm the little dude jumping. My face is saying, "The finish line is right there! It's so close. Just one more hurdle and I can do it!" The people behind him watching are all of you! I've had so much encouragement along the way and I'm so thankful for it! The people behind him standing up and looking are all of you who are saying, "Girl, you crazy!"

This morning I got up an hour before my alarm went off because I'm so excited to go home. I usually roll over and check all of my random emails that I get throughout the night and when I did that this morning, I came across this...

...thus the reason for my excitement.  David's Bridal, I am eager to see you as well!

Today, the cleanse is supposed to be all about the soup. I packed everything up in my handy-dandy Publix bag, packed my car with dress shopping supplies, clothes for the weekend, and my ice chest full of fruit and I was off to work. About 4 miles away from my apartment, I had to pull over and rearrange how the soup was situated because it was spilling.

I was planning on just eating some soup around 10:15 or 10:30. But by the time I got to work, I was really hungry. Since soup was about the last thing I wanted at 8:30 a.m. I decided to cheat just a weeeee bit and I grabbed a handful of grapes from the ice chest. I very highly doubt that eating six grapes first thing in the morning on day seven is going to ruin my cleanse (but if it does, I'll let you know).

Out of curiosity and excitement, I checked Jason and my wedding website to see how many days we have until we say, "I do."

I almost squealed at my desk. Less than 150 days!

On a side note, but still an important note, today is the one year anniversary of the tornadoes that affected so many lives in Alabama. I hope and pray that those who have lost loved ones as well as dear possessions will rely on the hope that we find in Christ alone.

Growing up on the coast of Florida, I feel like I know all too well the power that a storm can have on our lives. In my almost 23 years of life I believe that I've also experienced storms spiritually and emotionally that affect each one of us in different ways. Whenever I hear reports of storms on the news, or experience them first hand whether literally or figuratively, I am reminded of Job.

Job 1:20-22 says (after all of his possessions, wealth, AND children had been taken from him), "Then Job arose and tore his robe and shaved his head and fell on the ground and worshiped. And he said, “Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” In all this Job did not sin or charge God with wrong."

A dear friend of mine, Mandi Mapes, wrote a song after the earthquake struck Haiti in January 2010. I believe that the lyrics of this song are true in our lives in any type of storm.

In Your Arms (by Mandi Mapes)

 To read the rest of the lyrics to this song, go to the Radical Experiment page. If you'd like to read the story behind these lyrics, visit Mandi's blog. If you'd like to buy this song, go to iTunes.


So onto soup...

Eat to the smile!

I ate my first soup around 10:50 a.m., my second bowl around 12:30 p.m., and my third bowl around 1:00 p.m.

I was able to leave work today around 3:15. It was so wonderful to get on the road a little bit early.

After four hours of driving, I entered Destin with this beautiful view.

I truly do love my hometown. I'm proud to have been born and raised in paradise.

When I walked in the door, I was greeted by my parents and my beautiful sister, Carlee. I was starving. I had only eaten about 150 calories today, and I was in need of something...but not soup.

I heated up my soup and took a bite. I almost gagged. I've heard that a lot of times when you change your diet drastically, your body will give you cravings when you're in need of a type of food (I don't think this is true with ice cream though, unfortunately). 


This is what I ended up eating for dinner:

PROTEIN!

Dinner:
Mom's leftover ground turkey
Corn
Black beans
Kidney beans
Watermelon

Although I "broke" the cleanse tonight, I feel good about my decision. You have to listen to your body. And I didn't break out a gallon of ice cream, I just reverted back to the previous day's eating plan (poultry and veggies).

Well, I'm going to call it a night and spend some quality time with my family. My mom just said, "I think I'm obsessed with wedding stuff right now." I think that's my queue!

Tomorrow = COFFEE!
Cleanse = COMPLETE!

P.S. My mom just said, "Ruching does amazing things for people." We're watching "Say Yes to the Dress" preparing for tomorrow! AAAHHH! I'm convinced my mother is a cartoon character.

Day 6: Downhill Slope ... & Cake

Well, here we are with just one day left of the modified GM's cleanse. I feel like it's been an uphill climb for the last six days, and now I'm on the downhill slope.

This morning I got up and cut up the biggest cucumber I've ever seen. I packed a snack box full of cucumbers, celery, and veggie hummus. With snacks and herbal tea in hand, I headed off to work.

Although I'm not a musician and I only sing sort of well in the shower, music is a big part of my life. It can honestly completely change my mood. It wakes me up on the five hour drive to Destin that I've recently been making frequently. It gives me strength to push through a good workout. It allows me to pour out my heart to God with words that I am not clever enough to come up with, but that I truly desire to express. It taps into emotions that I'm feeling, whether I'm mad or sad or hurt or excited. And honestly, it sets the tone for my day.

I'm a big fan of shuffle. There are very rare occasions when I select a specific artist or album that I want to listen to, especially on my drive to work. It's kind of like a little surprise every three or four minutes, and it just makes life more interesting. Whenever I get a "good shuffle" in the morning, I know I'm going to have a good day. This morning was one of those times.

Can you guess what time I have to be at work?

I have time for about four songs on my way to work. And these four songs just made my day brighter. Jason has been gone for eight days, and I really miss him. I was overly excited that our song (Goodnight Moon by Go Radio) came on right as I was turning onto the exit for work. I try not to listen to that song a lot because I don't want it to get it old, but today was definitely a day I decided to sing along!

When I got to work I headed downstairs to fix my water and prepare my cucumber for breakfast.

Nothing exciting...just cucumbers.

It's strange how I've always boxed in certain foods as "breakfast foods" and I get so upset when I'm out of boiled eggs, oats, cottage cheese, or yogurt (my usual rotation of breakfast options). Usually when this happens, I just throw in the towel and head to McDonald's for an Egg McMuffin. Now, due to these veggie days, I know that I can eat healthy at breakfast even I only have lunch/dinner foods around. Now the Egg McMuffin can be something I choose to get on a day that I'm wanting to treat myself to something a little less healthy, rather than get it out of "necessity".

Over the last six days, I've had to withstand a lot of temptation. There's been an invite to Pinkberry, which is probably my favorite yogurt shop. I've had 64 K-Cups delivered to my apartment. My roomie and her fiancé made chocolate chip cookies one night. My roomie and her fiancé made curry one night. My roomie and her fiancé made Mexican food one night (okay, basically I live with someone not doing a cleanse, which is okay, but it's been hard). We went to Rojo yesterday for lunch. Each of those things have come and gone though. If I just got through that meal, it was over and I'd made it through. Then, we had a wedding shower at work. The leftover cake has been sitting in the kitchen and it's literally torture. Today this happened: 

The first thing that went through my mind was Matthew 6:23.
Maybe a little dramatic, but it was such a temptation...all..day...long.

I've always identified with this little guy, but thanks to self-control that can literally only be from God, I have not even tasted the cake!

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I just love that. That literally describes my relationship with "dieting" and food perfectly.

Today for lunch I met up with two friends from the Children's Homes. We decided to go to Moe's because they have Thank You Thursday. I'd never heard of such a thing, but I quickly learned that it means you can buy one meal and get the second for $2.99 and you get two large drinks. Awesome deal! I opted for the Alfredo Garcia Streaker, which means a chicken fajita with no tortillas. I went without cheese and only got veggies. 

Fajita chicken + grilled onioins + green peppers + cucumbers +
pico de gallo + shredded lettuce + corn pico = delicious!

Needless to say, real food tastes amazing. But it was also super high in calories. Probably not the smartest idea for a cleanse, but I'd only had 25 calories so far today. I'd say with the taste, price, and fellowship, it was totally worth it! It's also awesome that I was able to meet friends for lunch without going off the cleanse.


As soon as I got home from work I hit the ground running heating up leftover chicken and squash and making my soup. Let's just say I had to run the dishwasher and our entire dish drying rack is now full. 

Here's my dinner:

Dinner:
About 6 oz. leftover crockpot chicken
About 4 c. leftover zucchini and yellow squash
Salsa

I also got tired of the Hunger Games cup and I found this lovely cup in the back of my cabinet. Roll Tide.

So, here are a few shots of the process of making the soup:

Cabbage, chopped onions, Lipton Beefy Onion soup mix, celery, diced tomatoes

And here's the finished product:

Soup Recipe:
1 Head of cabbage
1 Onions chopped
Celery chopped (I used my leftovers from veggie days)
2 Cans plain diced tomatoes, no salt added
2 Packets Lipton Beefy Onion Soup mix
9 c. Water
Bring to a boil and stir frequently.

After dinner I headed to the Summit to meet a friend I was buying a Kindle from. I'm so excited to finally have some sort of digital reader.

Last, but certainly not least, it was time to pack! I'm leaving from work to go straight to Destin tomorrow. I had to store my soup and pack an ice chest to take fruit home.

Fruit on the left, soup on the right. What's up road trip?

I'm not used to packing food, so I hope this all goes well. It has to sit all day tomorrow at work and the 4.5 hour trip home.

As much as I'm ready for this cleanse to be over, I have to admit that I'm a little nervous about not having the strict food restrictions. I'm hoping and praying that I have an easy transition out of the cleanse and a seamless move into a healthier lifestyle.

Here is my calorie count for the day:

And now it's time to quit rambling and go pack my clothes...LET THE COUNTDOWN BEGIN!

Day 5 (Part 2): Tomaeto/Tomotto

The dreaded day arrived. It came and went swiftly. I'm not sure how I did it, but I ate tomatoes today.

So today was tomato and chicken/turkey day. I honestly meant to make a trip to Publix last night to get some turkey from the deli, but I was just too tired. Today was all about me, tomatoes, and chicken.

In case you're interested on why tomatoes, you're not alone. I asked myself the same thing. I was hoping to get out of eating tomatoes. But I had to eat them.

Here's what I discovered: the blog I got this cleanse from says to drink plenty of water with each tomato consumed because you're washing out the uric acid. I am not a science person, so I searched for what uric acid is and does. Basically, I had to eat tomatoes because I haven't been eating meat. My body is no longer accustomed to the 10-12 oz. of poultry I consume on a daily basis. Meat has uric acid. Too much uric acid causes gout. Tomatoes clean the uric acid from your system.

Now, I'm not a doctor or a nutritionist, so I don't know if this is the exact process that our bodies go through, but this was the gist that I got from Google. If you have gout and you're wanting to heal yourself, I don't know if you should eat tomatoes. I didn't go that far in my research.

Moving on...

I've never eaten a full tomato. One bite usually makes me gag. But at 10:30 this morning, I found myself sitting in front of this:

Tomato sliced. Large glass of water. Tea.

First bite made me gag.

Then I decided to chase each bite with a big swig of water. 

I did make it through, but I did not like it one bit.

About 45 minutes later I had to eat lunch because some of my co-workers and I were going to Rojo for a goodbye lunch. One of my friends/co-workers has taken a job at another company, so we took her out to lunch to bid her farewell :(

So around 11:15, I found myself in the kitchen making this lunch:

Plate before and plate after. Also, lots of water.

Lunch:
5 oz. of boneless skinless chicken breasts cooked in the crock-pot
1 tomato diced

I never thought I would put tomatoes on my plate on purpose, but this time was much better than this morning. Each bite had chicken and tomato, so I didn't have to wash the tomato down with water as many times.

I was so excited to eat chicken again though! I'm a carnivore...hooray!

Rojo was the first restaurant I've stepped in to since I've been doing the cleanse. I have to admit that I was worried I'd throw everything aside and order a huge burrito. But I did not. I fixed myself a glass of water and made some good conversation. I left without one bite of this yummy goodness:

Rojo is definitely one of my favorite restaurants in Birmingham.

I must admit that last night I was praying for self control and God sure did deliver.

Around 2:30 I headed downstairs to the kitchen at work. I cut up another tomato at ate it plain. I stayed down there to eat it, therefore there isn't a picture. I figured I would just stand and eat it at the counter in an effort to eat it faster. It worked sorta, but I have to confess that I threw the last two bites into the garbage can. Then I made some green tea.

I made it through the rest of the work day just find, but when I got home I was ready for dinner.

I whipped up a nice little concoction of chicken and tomatoes.

I'm not sure if this is a full pound, but that's what myfitnesspal told me it was.

Dinner:
1 lb. ground chicken
2 cans of diced tomatoes

Dinner tasted a lot like spaghetti at first. It was delicious and I scarfed the first bowl down way too fast. I was still really hungry though because I'd only eaten about 200 calories thus far, so I went back for seconds and ending up eating the entire meal.

Many times I make something similar but I throw in a lot more veggies and usually some salsa and taco seasoning. That usually makes 2-3 servings if I eat it without anything else. I'm glad that I'm full now, but I'm kind of regretting the pound of chicken I ate.

Other than water and some herbal tea, that's a wrap on my food for today. Tomorrow should be much more interesting! I cannot wait to eat poultry and veggies!!

Here is my calorie count for the day:

Hope you all had a wonderful Wednesday. If you haven't read "Part 1," please take a few minutes to check it out!

Day 5 (Part 1): Wednesday Wake-Up Call

Is it just me or is this week going by pretty slow? It's probably because I've got my sights set on Saturday...for many reasons. Reuniting with coffee is definitely up there on the list, but I'm also going to be at my parent's house this weekend in Destin and I'll be wedding dress shopping (finally)! So the days seem to linger on a little more than I'd like, but it's definitely given me a lot of time to reflect.

I've never been one to put my deepest feelings on the internet. You won't find any posts from me on Facebook that passive-aggressively hint (or rather directly point) to a fight or argument I've had with Jason or my mom. There aren't any notes of deep seeded feelings about life and how I need to pursue more make some big life altering change.

But...in doing this cleanse and having time to reflect on how I'm feeling, whether or not I'm hungry, and deciding if I'm going to pass out or not (that's a joke, kind of) and through all of this over the last four days, I've realized something about myself that is important for anyone reading my blog to reflect on themselves.

Self-image issues are something that haunt most woman, and unfortunately many teenage girls as well. Most of us don't like to admit it, but it's true. I'm not claiming to have a cure for loving yourself better or looking your best tomorrow, but I do think that I've come to realize something important that will truly change my life, and hopefully yours.

Are you ready for it?

Here it is...

God is in control. 

Simple, right? You'd think that. But it's undoubtedly the most complex and complicated thing for me to grasp. I'm always trying to take over!

If you read my first blog leading up to the cleanse (read it here), you'll see that I've always struggled with my weight. I remember being in second grade and looking around at the kids in P.E. and wondering why I couldn't run as fast as they could, and why my stomach was rounder than theirs. In middle school, I cheered and danced on my school's Cheer/Dance Team and I wore the little cheerleading and dance outfits, but I was also so uncomfortable going out to perform in front of my peers. I remember when my team ordered new cheerleading outfits and I had one of the biggest skirts. Looking back at that point in my life, I wasn't fat, or even really chubby, I'm just curvy. I realize that now, but as we all know, in the moment (and especially at 13 when I just wanted to fit in) I was so hard on myself and I wondered why I could not overcome this. In high school, I quit cheering and dancing to pursue other extracurricular activities and I started gaining weight fast. My mom let me have a personal trainer for a little while just so I could learn the correct way to work out and exercise. At that time, TrimSpa was really popular for girls at my high school to take and they lost weight fast, but it was not in any way healthy. I think my mom feared that I would do that, so she was trying to cut me off before I got to that point.

Here's where things got tricky. No matter what I did, I could not lose the weight. Over the course of about a year I gained 30-40 pounds. I was a 16-year-old girl, growing up in Destin on the beach, and I hated the way I looked in a swim suit. So, my mom started taking me to doctors. To make a long story short, about a year later I found out that I'm insulin resistant. From the moment I found out, I knew that my whole life it would always be harder for me to lose weight. And boy was I right.

College was a combination of ups and downs with my weight. This is when I realized that I have issues with food and exercise. I'm a fixer, and I like instant results. If I run for a week, I want to reap the benefits of it. I want to see more muscle and less fat by the end of the day. Obviously, I know that's not how it works, but I've never been satisfied with this whole waiting and keep working thing.

I also learned in college that I'm an emotional eater. The summer/fall of my sophomore year at Samford was the smallest and healthiest I've probably been since I was 14. I was running about three or four days a week and I was eating really healthy. Then, around Thanksgiving that year, my family started facing a lot of persecution and going through the biggest trial of our lives. I began eating for pleasure and comfort rather than eating for energy and I gained all of my weight back...and then some.

For the most part, that leads us to now. Now I'm just shy of 23-years-old and I'm getting married in less than five months. Now, I am the biggest I've ever been and I don't understand why. I eat healthy, or at least fairly healthy. I exercise pretty regularly. Why can't I lose weight?

This question has literally been haunting me for months.

Last night I was reading Matthew 15 and 16. Those are the passages of scripture that talk about what defiles a person, Jesus feeds the four thousand, the Sadducees and Pharisees demand signs, Peter confesses Jesus as the Christ, and the call for us to take up our cross and follow Jesus. Nothing about weight loss or self-esteem in there. Right? Well, no, not directly.

Here's what stuck out to me though: the story of the Canaanite woman. This woman was not Jewish, but she is asking Jesus to heal her daughter of a demon. Jesus basically just states that he was sent for the people of Israel (the Jewish people). He uses and analogy of taking children's bread and giving it to the dogs. But here's where it gets good.

Matthew 15:27-28 says, "She said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from their masters' table.” Then Jesus answered her, “O woman, great is your faith! Be it done for you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed instantly."

I'm not claiming to have an issue like this woman's. And I'm not expecting for Jesus to just say a few words and for me to be at my ideal weight or size. But, I do want Jesus to look at his daughter, Jessica Sansom, and say, "O woman, great is your faith!" Honestly, that is my deepest desire. 

For me, a healthy lifestyle and losing weight a physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual battle. There are not many things in my life that come this difficult for me, but this is certainly one of them. 

I've always known this was a physical battle. When I found out that that I am insulin resistant, I realized that it was a mental battle. In college when my family was facing persecution and trials I realized it was an emotional battle. But just now I'm realizing that this is a spiritual battle. 

This this brings me to the "call to action" so to speak. What am I going to do about this? How will I fight this battle? 

Well, I'm going to pray first. I'm going to seek God. I'm going to dive into his Word. And then I'm going to be obedient. 


I know that this blog post has been long and you probably know way more about me than you'd ever care to. But I hope and pray with everything in me that this post touches and helps at least one other person. 


Like I said, we all have image and self-esteem issues. Whether or not they dominate our thoughts, minds, or lives is irrelevant. Or maybe your biggest issues aren't self-esteem or self-image, but rather something else. But regardless of what they are, have you given your issues to God? Have you called out to him? Have you accepted that he is in control and is sovereign over you and over your life?


For once, I need to stop rambling and just pray. Will you be in prayer with me today?

Day 4: This-Cleanse-is-Bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S

A little Gwen Stefani throwback for all you early 2000s middle/high schoolers out there. 

Happy Tuesday everyone! In an effort to not lose readers, I'm going to try to keep today's blog short and sweet. I had a lot to say yesterday, but today is just...well...bananas.

I also need to clarify that Jason's dinner picture that he demolished last night was a special and rare occasion. He tours with Casting Crowns as one of their merchandise guys and one night of each tour Mark Hall, the band's lead singer, takes all of the crew guys out for a manly man's dinner. That's why there was so much meat. He didn't send me a picture of his dessert, which is probably for the best :)

Okay, onto today.

Today is banana day. I get to eat up to eight bananas and I get to drink up to eight glasses of skim milk.

This morning, I made a huge mistake when I woke up. I was planning on completing day two of the 30 Day Shred, but I didn't weigh before I began the workout, therefore I didn't want to drink any water before the workout. Stupid me. Let's just say as soon as that 27 minutes ended, I ran and jumped on the scale, then ran to the kitchen for a Hunger Games glass of water.

After getting ready for work, I packed my food. Much easier today, but also quite a bit heavier.

7 bananas. 1 gallon of skim milk. 1 8 oz. glass.

I'm sure everyone who shares the fridge at work is hating me today. Usually I write my initials "JLS" on all of my food...but today I just put a big "J" so maybe people won't know it's mine.

I also put about a pound of raw chicken breast in the crockpot before I left for work. I am excited to eat meat again tomorrow. YAY for protein!

I ate my first banana and drank my first glass of milk before work. I tried to space everything out about two to two-and-a-half hours. Also, I drank a ton of water in between.

Side note: What's with the weather? It's almost May and it was so cold this morning! This Florida girl is ready for the summer to kick in (although I'm sure I'll be begging for fall by June).

Another side note: Do you ever have a song come on, especially in the morning, and you're just like, "Yes, this is perfect!"? Well, I did, and it made my drive to work quite delightful.

Funny story about this song. Jason and I have a friend (he was Jason's friend first, but I adopted him as my friend too) who plays drums. He loves this song because of the drum beat or melody or some musical term. But the first couple of lyrics to this song are, "I wish I were pretty". Every time this song comes on, I think about him looking into a mirror batting his eyes singing this to himself. I just can't help it. Maybe that's why I enjoyed it so much on my way to work.

Okay, back on track.

In an effort not to bore you with a bunch of pictures of bananas and milk, I'll post the times in which I ate the bananas and milk at the end of the post.

Jason has been trying to be a little more active in his spare time on the road. One of the opening artists on the tour with them sent me this picture of Jason playing Wiffle Ball.

Jason up to bat! Picture courtesy of Lindsay Mattingly

Unfortunately, his team didn't win, but he did slide into home base. GO JASON!

I've become accustomed to my 3:00 snack time. It gives me something to look forward to after lunch and makes the stretch to 5:00 not seem so long. I wasn't really ready for another banana since I ate lunch around 1:00, so I settled for a 3:00 tea time.

I could definitely be British. Delicious!

I got home from work tonight feeling quite weak. Not weak in the "I need to eat" way. I just have a lack of energy. This could be because of the food selection today. Or it could be because I have been using a lot of energy this week and not eating the foods to support that. More than likely, it's a combination of both.

I was planning on going for another nice walk after work today, but I decided to just go home and rest due to my lack of energy.

When I arrived home I found this little gem.

Special Delivery to me! Saturday morning is going to be great!

Talk about temptation. There are exactly 64 K-Cups full of coffee grounds in this box.

My eating times ended up being (all of these are a medium banana and 8 oz. of skim milk):
7:30 - Milk & Banana
8:00 - Herbal Tea
10:15 - Banana
11:30 - Milk
1:00 - Banana & Milk
3:15 - Herbal Tea
4:30 - Banana
6:00 - Milk
7:15 - Herbal Tea
8:00 - Milk & Banana (this is my plan at least it's only 7:15 now)

Day "boring" 4 = complete

On that note, I'm going to call it a night soon. I'm off to watch the New Girl and hit the hay early.

Tomorrow is chicken/turkey and tomato day. I'm very much looking forward to eating chicken, but very hesitant about the tomato part. I'm hoping that tomorrow is a turning point for me and my food habits. I would love to like tomatoes, or at least not hate them.

Enough rambling on my end for one day. How are you feeling today?

Day 3: The Underlying Accomplishment

Before I get started, I just have to brag! I have the most amazing, beautiful, and kind-spirited sisters in the world. See how stunning they looked for their prom?!?  I'm pretty sure their prom experience was just about as good as it gets. They both had great dates and they were in a group together with some really awesome friends. They got to dance a ton and they stayed until it was over! I just can't believe how old they're getting. They look so grown up!

Carlee (left) and Julia (right). It must be awesome to go to prom with your sister! Wish I could have gone :)

Moving on before I cry...

For anyone who knows me, you know that I am a coffee...um...connoisseur? Well, more like addict. I have been drinking regular coffee since late middle school (I drank the fancy more of a milkshake stuff before that). There have been times in my life (mainly college) when I drink 3-5 cups of coffee a day. I've always been able to "cut back" on my coffee intake, and for a brief but memorable month or so I drank half-caf. Now, I drink about 1-2 cups a day, and I usually drink tea in the afternoons rather than coffee. But I love coffee nonetheless.

I have noticed lately that if I don't drink my morning coffee that by about lunchtime, I'll have a headache in the afternoon. I have pretty frequent headaches anyway, but these come consistently if I don't reach my quota of caffeine before noon arrives.

So, what does this mean? It means that for this week, April 21st-27th, I am giving up coffee. I, Jessica Sansom, will not drink coffee for seven days.

Although this cleanse allows me to have black coffee with no cream or sweetener, I've decided to forgo my coffee intake for this week in an effort to prove I am not coffee-dependent.

Now, once Saturday rolls around, you better bet I'm going to enjoy a lovely cup of Joe. I even bought new K-Cups for this occasion (I know that's probably a little excessive, but I truly was almost out).

For the first two days of the cleanse, I did experience the off and on headache that I associate with lack of coffee. The good news is, this morning I was okay.

Now onto this morning...

I woke up feeling great. I wasn't hungry, and my pants were fitting a little better. I weighed myself again, and I was just shy of another pound lighter. That puts me at a grand total of 2.6 pounds since Saturday morning. I've read that the bulk of the weight loss in this cleanse comes in days 4-6. We'll see...

If you remember from last night, I had to really prepare for work today. I spent some time chopping and sorting through Tupperware to bring all of my fruits and veggies to work with me. I WAY over packed! But I was just worried that my blood sugar would drop and there is a McDonald's right next door to my office. So I packed my bag and headed off to work.

1. Bag full of goodies 2. Huge Publix bag with my herbal tea ready to go 3. Melon medley before I ate 4. Melon Medley after I ate (not much different than the before picture)

Breakfast consisted of:
Cubed Honeydew Melons
Cubed Watermelon
Cubed Cantaloupe

As you can see, I didn't even make a dent in this huge helping-o-melon.

I discovered another blog that gives a more in-depth description of a very similar cleanse. I'm glad that I chose the one I'm doing for a couple of reasons, but mainly because I would rather eat chicken and turkey over beef any day. I'm not a big red meat eater. But this blog did answer a couple of the questions that I had. If you're considering doing this cleanse, check out this blog for more information about it: Nothing Is Impossible Blog

I cannot stress how important fluids are during this cleanse. I have been sticking to just water and herbal tea, but I've read that Crystal Light, black coffee, and club soda are allowed. This morning when I got to work, I headed downstairs to the kitchen to fix a tall glass of water (still not as big as my Hunger Games cup) and my second cup of herbal tea.

Water on the left and herbal tea in my pretty mug on the right.

I had to work at the front desk from noon until 1:00 today, so I grabbed my almost untouched breakfast and a handful of grapes to snack on until lunch.

After front desk duty, I went downstairs to the kitchen to eat lunch. I mixed a can of mixed veggies with a can of green beans and I cut up an orange for lunch. Simple...yes...but also very satisfying (at least for an hour or so).

I accidentally dropped an orange slice on the floor. I had to throw it out :(

Lunch:
14 oz. Canned Mixed Veggies
14 oz. Canned Green Beans
1 Sliced Orange

Around 3:00 I ate some strawberries and made more tea. And then around 4:30 I ate an apple. I was making sure that I was full before work ended because I was going on a walk with a girl I work with at 5:00.

Oh my fruit snacks.

Our walk was quite successful. We walked for a little over an hour and it was such a beautiful day I didn't even feel like I was exercising.

Don't judge my speed. I have short legs. 

When I got home, I made two delicious bowls of spinach goodness. Only one made the picture because I ate the second one too fast.

Spinach Bowl #1.

Dinner:
2 c. Spinach Leaves
1 Avocado
4 Cucumber Slices
1/2 Lemon Juice
1 package Frozen Chopped Spanach
4 tbsp. Mild Salsa

After dinner I decided to give Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred a try...again. I will stick with it this time...I will! I will! For more information on Jillian's 30 Day Shred, click here.

After dinner, my roommate and I were in for a little show, and we didn't even know it! We were just sitting in the living room, and all of a sudden she pointed out the people across the parking lot from us. They live on the second floor and I guess they're moving out. Instead of taking their furniture through the front door, like normal people, they were tossing it off the balcony. I wanted to go out on our porch and take a video of it, but she wouldn't let me. So I settled for taking a video through the blinds...and thus...here we are:

And to answer her question, yes, they did break the gate beneath them. 

A couple of hours later, I was ready for another snack. My photography skills are getting less creative as the day goes on, so here's my after dinner snack: cucumbers, veggie hummus, and a couple of grapes.

Hunger Games cup is back!

So that's all for today. I know this was a super long post, but it's been quite a day!

Here's my calorie count for the day, in case you're curious.

And here's Jason's dinner plate, post eating. I'm on a cleanse, and he is not :)

Jason demolished his dinner. Yummy in one way, gross in another way.

I would truly appreciate prayers. Tomorrow is banana and milk day. I'm not looking forward to it :(

Enough rambling for today...goodnight all!

Monday Morning Mission

This morning I thought I would start off by sharing a psalm. Sometimes, especially on Mondays, I forget that I am not in control. 

It is my mission this week to remember that God is not only the creator of the universe and sovereign over all, but he's the creator of ME and he's sovereign over MY LIFE!

That is something to praise him for!

Psalm 46:8-11 says:

Come, behold the works of the Lord,
    how he has brought desolations on the earth. 
  He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;
    he breaks the bow and shatters the spear;
     he burns the chariots with fire. 
  “Be still, and know that I am God.
     I will be exalted among the nations,
    I will be exalted in the earth!”
  The Lord of hosts is with us;
    the God of Jacob is our fortress.

What is your mission this Monday?

Day 2: Veggies in my Belly

Two days down and five more to go!

Before I get started on my day two stories, I wanted to go back to day one for just a moment. First, I weighed myself this morning and I was two pounds lighter than I was at the beginning of day one.  YAY! I've been keeping track of my calories on myfitnesspal.com. I'm keeping track more just out of curiosity. If I go over my calorie intake for the day, I still eat as long as I'm hungry (best part about the cleanse thus far). Yesterday my calorie intake was over by about 100 calories. I still continued eating though because, as you remember, I got really weak toward the end of the night.

Now, onto day two!

This morning I woke up and had mentally prepared myself to eat veggies for breakfast. I ended up eating a cucumber and drinking some herbal tea. I had some time to kill before church, which was good because I really needed to prepare for the eighth grade small group I teach on Sunday mornings. It was a beautiful morning, so I opened up the sliding glass door and window and enjoyed the cool breeze as I drank my tea and ate my cucumbers.  

Cucumbers and tea. A combination I never thought I'd eat for breakfast.

I headed off to church to teach my lovely eighth grade girls small group. Side note: We discussed how we love God today. So to go along with that lesson, I had my girlies take the 5 Love Languages assessment. I am Words of Affirmation first but followed by one point, I'm Quality Time. 

When I got home, I made myself a lovely lunch. Today called for a potato. I didn't want to spend time cooking a potato, so I went through the drive though at Wendy's to get a plain baked potato. I also stopped at Whole Foods on my way home and some garden vegetable hummus to accompany my raw veggies. Funny contrast between the Whole Foods bag and the Wendy's bag. 

I tore into that potato like nobody's business. And there's the Hunger Games cup!

Lunch:

2 c. of Spinach Leaves

1/2 Avacado

1/2 Squeezed Lemon

1 Plain Baked Potato

1 tsp. of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter

I had to snack a lot this afternoon. I spent some time chopping and sautéing some zucchini and yellow squash. 

Perfect colors for a beautiful day.

I also made some tea. 

About an hour later, I was ready for another snack. This time it was celery and my veggie hummus.

Snack two and three. I didn't eat all of the celery. I just cut all of it for the week at one time.

Then about an hour later I was getting ready to leave for church, and so I ate another snack. Yummy green beans with a little bit of salsa mixed in for a kick. 

Around 5:00 I headed out the door for church, again. I had a couple of errands to run on my way there, but I ended up only being able to cross one off my list before church. Oh well...

I made another stop at Walmart on my way home from church. I think I have everything for the rest of the week, but this is really getting kind of expensive. I haven't spent any more on food this week than I normally spend, but if I have to go to the store again, I'll be over budget. On the bright side, this cleanse is so strict that it doesn't allow me to eat out at all, so it all balances out.

I also got a lampshade for my new garage sale lamp! I'll post a picture tomorrow hopefully.

I finally got home tonight around 8:30. I was hungry, but I wasn't starving, which was a surprisingly good feeling. After last night I was really afraid I would be about ready to pass out on my way home from church. For dinner, I made a modified version of my lunch salad. Unfortunately, I couldn't eat another potato. 

Green goodness. 

Dinner:

1 c. Spinach Leaves

1 c. Chopped Kale

1/2 Avacado

1/2 Squeezed Lemon

5 Cucumber Slices

1/2 c. Mild Salsa

I haven't had to eat anything else tonight, which is pleasantly surprising. I spent the remainder of my evening cutting up fruits and preparing for work tomorrow. 

So far, I haven't been tempted to cheat, but I am afraid that I will now that the work week is beginning. I'm trying to be as prepared as possible. It should be relatively easy tomorrow, but I worry about day four and five since I'm limited in what I'm able to eat. I'm really just worried about being hungry, but I think by then my body will be used to this...I hope. 

Here's my calorie count for today. Veggies are definitely less calories. 

So, goodnight all. Goodnight blogisphere. Tomorrow I get fruits AND veggies! Hooray!