What kind of filter are you using?

I keep being drawn back to this idea of filtering. In fact, last night Jason and I even had to go buy a new water filter for our fridge (ours was a casualty of last week's fridge fiasco). Many times, God uses repetition to get our attention. So, when I kept hearing the same phrase used over and over again, I knew that I needed to apply it to my life out of obedience.

When I was reading Made to Crave this excerpt from chapter 14 really stuck out to me:

"What about you? Do you have something from your past that causes emotional emptiness? As a first step toward healing, can you think of one thing good from this past situation? Or maybe something good that has happened despite the pain from the event? If not, ask God to give you some good place to park your mind with this draining issue from your past. Then, try walking through the following exercise based on Philippians 4:8.
Whatever is true...
Whatever is noble...
Whatever is right...
Whatever is pure...
Whatever is lovely...
Whatever is admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy...
Piece by piece, God has created a mosaic in my heart—one of restoration, healing, and compassion. I am the person I am today in part because of the hurt of being left behind by my dad. I wouldn’t have chosen that piece of my mosaic, but how good of God to place right beside the hurt a clear piece of glass shaped like those warm icicles from so long ago. A memory I can think on. A memory that fills me better than any piece of chocolate cake or nacho chips. A memory that is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. And filling."

Source

So, I finished that book and about a week later I attended the women's workshop at church. When talking about renewing our minds, this is what I learned:

Step 1: Remember the ABC...
Actuating Event - things that we cannot control; triggers that cause tough emotions to flair up; "pop ups" like from AOL in 1999
Beliefs/Thoughts about the Event - we recognize more of the emotions rather than the actual belief
Consequences of Those Beliefs - emotions; physical actions; what stems from these thoughts?
Disputing False Beliefs with the truth - know the truth; know God's Word; identify the truth based on God's Word
Effect New Consequences - emotions that are manifested out of the knowledge of the truth from God's Word

Step 2: Identify...
What are my emotions? Are they true?

Step 3: Filter...
Philippians 4:8 test - Is it [my emotions or my feelings that are troubling] true? Is it honorable? Is it just? Is it pure? Is it lovely? Is it commendable? Is it excellent? Is it worthy of praise?

Step 4: Replace...
If the answer to the above question is "no", then take off the "old self" and put on "new self" (Colossians 3:9-10). Be ready with weapons to replace your "old self" (aka God's Word).

Step 5: Accountability...
We cannot renew our minds by yourself. Surround yourself with people who are encouragers, not discouragers. Surround yourself with people who will speak truth into your life.

As I mentioned in my Mad Men post from yesterday, about 24 hours after this workshop, I was sitting on my couch watching TV Sunday night when I started to feel sick to my stomach. I thought about the "Philippians 4:8 Filter". I knew the verse, but I'd never heard it called that before. Then, in two weeks, it was being brought to my attention over and over. So, I took the hint and went through it.

Is this show true? No. It's not real life. Real life probably never has to will look like this.
Is this show honorable? No. As how that allows infidelity to be okay is not honorable to my husband. It's polluting my mind.
Is it just? No. He never gets caught. Or his wife is just okay with it. That's stupid. Both of them are stupid.
Is it pure? No way. This isn't hard. Adultery in any form is not pure - EVER.
Is it lovely? No, it's making me sick just watching it.
Is it commendable? No. No explanation needed.
Is it excellent? No. See above.
Is it worthy of praise? No. Not by me. Maybe some crazy gross men would think so, but according to God's Word, the only thing that I should praise are things that are given by God. Adultery is the opposite.

Thus yesterday's blog post was written.

So, that all seems kind of obvious, right? Like, it's not hard to figure out that if your mind is being effected by something that is externally being put into it, like a TV show, then turn the TV show off. But, what about things that are internally polluting our mind? How are we supposed to renew our minds and filter through the good and the bad in those circumstances?

The same way.

For example, I really want a house. Jason and I live in an apartment now, and it's a great apartment but I just really am tired of living there and I want a house. But, we've only been married for seven months, we're both just beginning our careers, and houses are a huge and an expensive investment.

So, how to I filter through my obsession of driving through neighborhoods almost on a daily basis and getting the "gimme wants"?

Yeah, I have 146 pins for what I want in a home.
It's not something I'm proud of.
Look at this board here.

Is this show true? Yes, eventually Jason and I will buy a house...Lord willing.
Is this show honorable? Yes. We want to buy a house big enough for the family we dream of having someday.
Is it just? Yes. Maybe not right now - it's not justifiable - because we still have time left on our lease and we're in the middle of saving for a down payment.
Is it pure? Yes and no. Yes, I want a house because I want to fill both extra bedrooms with a child someday. No, right now we don't NEED it and I really would like to have a house because that's what I want. I want more space. I was to show it off. I want others to come over and say, "Oh you have such a beautiful house!"
Is it lovely? Yes. After I finish decorating. Just kidding. But yes, buying a home with my husband with the money that God has blessed us with is a lovely thing...in His timing.
Is it commendable? Yes. It's a huge step forward. It's a huge investment. To be able to purchase a home is utilizing the blessings that God has given us with our jobs and our ability to manage and save money well.
Is it excellent? Yes. I hope so.
Is it worthy of praise? Again, yes and no. Yes, we will absolutely praise God for our home. I am confident that He will provide. But no, we don't deserve praise for it - it will truly be a gift from God.

Based on that, if I were someone else looking at my answers, I'd tell me that my obsession with buying a house isn't unhealthy, but I probably need to dial it down until the time comes. I need to renew my mind to focus on having contentment in our apartment and in this place of not having the responsibility of being a homeowner. That gives us more time without the financial pressures just to grow in our marriage.

So I ask you today, what kind of filter are you using? Are there things in your life that you need to put through the Philippians 4:8 Filter? Do you need to renew your mind, your heart, and/or your spirit? Is there something that is keeping you down, causing a pit in your stomach that you can't quite put your finger on, that needs to be dealt with?

Put it through the filter. Let the Lord work on you. Surround yourself with those who are encouraging and not discouraging. Spend time allowing truth to saturate your mind. Spending time in communication with Christ today.

The War Inside

I'm just going to warn you right now, buckle up because I'm probably going to reach a new level of rambling today. I've had the topic that I'm writing about on my mind for quite some time, and I feel like I've meditated on it enough that I finally have the courage to write about it.

I decided a couple of weeks ago that I have a theme song, at least a song for right now. I've mentioned before that I'm am overly affected by music and that it can really can steer my emotions. While I was on the treadmill about two weeks ago, The War Inside by Switchfoot came on. If you've never heard the song, it's really a great workout song, so I'd recommend adding that one to your playlist. But something about it just lit a fire inside of me...of about two days.

Isn't that how we are though? Don't we set our mind to something and we build up our determination, just to watch it crumble when it gets tough or uncomfortable? Maybe it's just me, but I'm pretty bad at sticking to things that are super tough, even when deep down I know that I want to.

Last week, for some reason I had these words swimming around in my head...all...week...long: "I do want I don't want to do and I don't do what I do want to  do." These words derived from the words of Paul in the New Testament when he wrote about his sin.

"For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. So I find it to be a law that when I want to do right, evil lies close at hand. For I delight in the law of God, in my inner being, but I see in my members another law waging war against the law of my mind and making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members. Wretched man that I am!" - Romans 7:14-24

Okay, so admittedly, I'm not the best at memorizing scripture word-for-word...but I had the gist of it rolling around in my brain for days.  

I keep setting my mind to things: eating good, sticking to Weight Watchers, working out on a daily basis, lowering my carb/sugar intake, not eating dessert, making healthy choices even when we're out, etc. I keep setting my mind to things and then at the drop of a hat, I just abandon them...even though I don't want to. I go for the ice cream, or I turn off my alarm in the morning, day after day after day. Obviously, I'm not saying that eating ice cream or sleeping until 7:00 rather than 6:00 is evil, like Paul is saying about his sin, I'm just saying that by my own strength, I cannot conquer any battle. 

As you've probably gathered by now from my blog, I really do hate putting bad things into my body. I really do hate going days at a time without working out. I really do want to be healthy and want to exercise. But than wretched sin that dwells within me goes against my better thoughts and desires and just takes over. 

I'd been really really hard on myself over the weekend. Jason was in a wedding so our dinners were provided to us at the wedding and rehearsal dinner, so it made it very difficult to stick to what I wanted to eat, which were healthy things (or at least healthier).

So there I was on Sunday afternoon, relaxing on the couch, and trying with everything inside of me to hold off on snacking and just wait until dinner. It was time to leave the apartment for church. Jason and I had been hanging out that afternoon, so we loaded into the car, and headed off. 

We made a few pit stops to turn in his tux from the wedding and also to peak into the new LOFT at the Summit (I'm a big fan by the way). While we were in LOFT, I tried on multiple items that didn't fit. I took the jeans that I really liked (but were one size to small) up to the register to see if they could get them from another store. The sales lady kindly told me that the size I had in my hands was the biggest size they carry in the store. Talk about humiliating. Talk about being really down on myself. Internally, I was a mess. 

Finally we arrived at church. I was so ready to just worship my Savior and Creator and just spend some concentrated time in corporate worship and study in His Word. Our executive pastor was the one preaching that day, and he told us to open our bibles to Romans 7. He explained that the text he would be preaching on that evening is very difficult to preach on, but absolutely necessary. The words he spoke could not have been more true. 

You see, he started out in Romans 7:14, which is where I had been kind of lingering all week long. But he did something that I had been failing to do...he kept reading. 

After Paul goes on and on about how dreadful this sin problem is, he says this:

"Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin. There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death." - Romans 7:25-8:2

[Here's the part that's hard for me to admit]

During his sermon, the pastor then said something that truly cut me to the core and convicted me in a way that I haven't been convicted in quite a while. 

I'm so bad about comparing myself to other people. Maybe it's the way the look and I figure out if I'm bigger than them, smaller than them, or the same. Maybe it's looking at someone's lifestyle or choices and knowing that they're walking an outwardly sinful life and concluding that I'm probably better off because most sin that I have (and I do realize that we ALL sin) in usually more inward. I'm very quick to just brush off my lack of self-control or my readiness to give up at something as me just "accepting myself the way I am". And while I do think it's important to know and understand that God has created each of us and we are His workmanship, my tendencies are nothing less than sin. 

 Here's what he said (this isn't word-for-word, but it's the best I could remember when I was jotting it all down): "We may look down the road and say to ourselves, 'Well, at least I'm not a drug addict like my neighbor over there.' But if we are growing Christians, we should look at ourselves in the mirror and say, 'I'm worse, I'm a a believer and I'm a pride addict, or a stuff addict, or a food addict.'" 


May I recognize the sin in my life and call it what it is. May I do so, not to be self-deprecating, but the be a growing believer.


I know that most of you have probably had that Sunday when you're sitting in the congregation minding your own business and then the pastor decides to basically call you out (not literally, but you feel like it). I have had many occasion such as this, and Sunday evening was definitely one of those times. I wanted to stand up and just say, "I get it, God! Thank you! Thank you God for saving me even me!"

I am set free by the blood of Jesus Christ. It doesn't matter what I do or how hard I try, I can never accomplish or defeat a battle without Him. 

“The Christian life is a life of continual struggle, of victories and defeats, and Christian victory comes only when we totally distrust self, and rely on the provision of God. How frequently we throw works out the front door of justification, and invite them in the back door of sanctification.” - John Stott 

This weekend I was reminded that there is a "war inside". There's a battle for my soul. But I take refuge in the fact that I also have the Holy Spirit dwelling inside of my soul. I am His, therefore there is no battle that will not be won.  

"I Will Not Abandon You!"

Yesterday I logged into iTunes to download the sermon from Brook Hills that I missed last week. I decided that listening to podcasts during work is a fantastic way to pass the time when I'm doing a lot of cutting and pasting in Excel.

Today when I came into work, I went through some old podcasts from Brook Hills that sounded interesting. They're all from before I started attending church there, so it's just kinda neat to go back and hear some of this stuff that the sermons now have been built upon.

The first one I listened to caught my eye because it's a sermon about adoption that was from Easter 2007. After listening to about 10 minutes of it, I knew that I had to share it with anyone and everyone.

I know that I've talked about my extreme passion for adoption (extreme might be a bit of an understatement) before on the blog (see part one and part two). But I thought that this sermon explained the very core truth of why I (and Jason) want to adopt someday. So...here it is:

Click here to listen/watch

Whether or not you decide to listen/watch the sermon is totally up to you (obviously)...but I wanted to share a couple of things for those of you who don't listen/watch it.

Adoption started out as something that I may resort to in the case that I am not able to have kids biologically. I have no clue if I can have biological children, but sometimes it's harder for women with insulin resistance to get pregnant, and sometimes it's impossible. So at a young age, I realized that adoption might be the way I have children.

Over the years, I've learned that adoption is kind of cool thing to do, especially among Christians. I don't want to say that it's "trendy", but it kind of is. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that adoption isn't cool or that it's not a beyond wonderful thing that adoption is "trendy" among Christians these days, it's a total miracle! But, for a little while there, my reasons for wanting to adopt became more about me than about the actual reality of adoption.

Here is the reality: adoption is not about us...it's about God. It's a perfect reflection of the relationship between the saved and the Savior.

This is how I know -

“But when the right time came, God sent his Son, born of a woman, subject to the
law. God sent him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that he could
adopt us as his very own children. And because we are his children, God has sent the
Spirit of his Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, ‘Abba, Father [which literally means "daddy"].’ Now you are no longer a slave but God’s own child. And since you are his child, God has made you his heir.” - Galatians 4:4-8

When we call upon the name of Jesus, God changes our "status" and we become His child, His heir. Just as when we adopt a child, their legal status is changed and they become our child, our heir.

“Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. So we praise God for the glorious grace he has poured out on us who belong to his dear Son. He is so rich in kindness and grace that he purchased our freedom with the blood of his Son and forgave our sins. He has showered his kindness on us, along with all wisdom and understanding.” - Ephesians 1:4-8

When we cry out to God, confess our sinfulness to Him, and our neediness for Him, we are adopted into His family! His family [the church] changes. We are added. Just as when we adopt a child, our family looks much different that it did before. It changes. A child is added.

“So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, ‘Abba, Father.’ For his Spirit joins with our spirit to affirm that we are God’s children. And since we are his children, we are his heirs. In fact, together with Christ we are heirs of God’s glory.” - Romans 8:15-17

“And we believers also groan, even though we have the Holy Spirit within us as a foretaste of future glory, for we long for our bodies to be released from sin and suffering. We, too, wait with eager hope for the day when God will give us our full rights as his adopted children, including the new bodies he has promised us.” - Romans 8:23

God promises His children a full inheritance. He doesn't hold out on any one of us who has called upon His name. He affirms us and loves us in all of His glory. Our lives and our future are forever changed. When we adopt, we give that child a full inheritance. We don't hold out on them. We affirm them and love them with all that we have. Their lives and their future are forever changed.

-------------

I am so thankful about the confidence that I have in Christ. I am thankful to know that I am a part of the family of God. I cannot wait to share even an ounce of that love with a child someday. As the graphic above says, "I am in love with a child I haven't met yet."

[Worry] Warts are Gross

When I was in 4th grade I had to create a business as a school project. Our entire classroom was covered in upside down refrigerator boxes for about a month. I don't remember the name of our business, but I do know that at first our business failed. 

Then, we learned about worry dolls. 

My mom taught my friend and me how to make worry dolls out of clothespins. We made hundreds of them, and they sold so well! In the end, we didn't fail.

Source

Ironically, we didn't fail this project because worry exists in the world. In fact, not only does it exist, it is ever present and prevalent in our lives. 

Last week I introduced you all to the book I'm reading called Calm my Anxious Heart. Well, I'm finally on chapter nine. I took me a day and night to finish chapter eight. Yes, I'm a slow reader, but it took me so long because I truly struggled through the chapter called, "Worry is not a Rocking Chair".

If you've ever taken the Myers Briggs personality test, you'll know what I mean when I say that I'm very much a "J". I'm convinced that this personality trait, plus the fact that I'm a sinner living in fallen world, leaves me with a lot of worry. As Jason says, I'm a "worrier". 

This is me way too often.
Source

This chapter of the book went all military on me (meaning that it broke me down and then eventually it built me back up). When the author, Linda Dillow, did a study on the topic of worry among women, she found that women worry about these things the most:

• Money
• Parenting
• Marriage
• Health
• Job security
• Weight
• Threats

Here are the reasons why women worry about these things:

• The world is out of control
• Families are out of control
• My life is out of control

Like Linda, I can definitely identity with these women, but for me, this list of reasons begs the question:

Who IS in control?

As I've already stated in a previous post, we know that God is in control.

In the book, Linda places a quote at the beginning of this chapter.

"George Müller said, 'The beginning of anxiety is the end of faith. The beginning of true faith is the end of anxiety.'  All our fret and worry are caused by calculating without God."*

When she wrote, "We say with one breath that we trust God and with the next breath how worried we are! Worry and anxiety give a small thing a big shadow, and this shadow creates problems, not just in the soul and spirit, but in the body,"**

When I read this yesterday, I felt like Linda could see into my filthy, unfaithful heart.

How many of us do this? How many of us sit at church and nod our heads and sing and worship, go to bible study and live out our "good Christian life", but then when we are alone or when one thing doesn't go our way, we freak out and ask God why he's doing this to us? I know that I am so very guilty of this.

I could probably write a book myself just on this topic alone. I could go on and on about how the only thing that God has done for us is send his perfect and holy Son to die on the cross for our sins. I could state that we are all hypocrites and in the middle of circumstances that are less than ideal, we should cling to the cross rather than blame the Sacrifice. I might even would add that if God gave us what we deserve, we probably would be a lot more upset about where we'd all end up.

But, I'm not a preacher. I'm just a girl who writes a blog to share with those of you who read it about what I'm walking through in my life. So, keeping that in mind, I will fall back into line and tell you all that I fail at not being anxious and not worrying each and every day. I fail miserably.

(And here it is folks, the call to action. You must have known by now that it was coming soon)

If you feel like you may identify with this, if you, like me, are a chronic worrier, here is some truthes that are so obvious, but sometimes so difficult to truly embrace.

• Worry doesn’t empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.**

• Perhaps the most striking characteristic of worry is its absolute impotence. Worry never changes a single thing except the worrier.**

• Worry is definitely counterproductive. Like our earlier illustration of a rocking chair, it doesn’t get us anywhere, but at least it gives us something to do, and women like to do something!***

• 1 Peter 5: 6-7 gave us an alternative to carrying the anxiety ourselves. "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."****

Source

May we cling to the truths of scripture.

May we pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). May with cast our anxiety on the Lord (1 Peter 5:6-7). May we be strong in Christ and not fear what circumstances come our way (Isaiah 35:3-5).  May we recognize that God has placed us here for a purpose, not just to survive (Matthew 6:25). May we not be anxious about tomorrow (Matthew 6:33-34). May we lift our voices in prayer instead of wasting away our days being anxious and worrying about things that God is sovereign over (Philippians 4:5-7).

Source

 
 Enough rambling for now...that picture was worth all the rest of my words (so stinkin' cute, right?). 

Prayer Focus for the Day: May we ask God to lead us to a place where we do not worry and we solely rely upon him for his provision. May we ask him to place people in our lives who can encourage us in this area of worry and anxiety. May we also ask God to place us in others' lives to be someone who is an encouragement to them.





****Dillow, Linda (2012-01-05). Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Finding Contentment with Bonus Content (p. 116). Navpress. Kindle Edition. 

***Dillow, Linda (2012-01-05). Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Finding Contentment with Bonus Content (p. 114). Navpress. Kindle Edition.

**Dillow, Linda (2012-01-05). Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Finding Contentment with Bonus Content (p. 113). Navpress. Kindle Edition.

*Dillow, Linda (2012-01-05). Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Finding Contentment with Bonus Content (p. 108). Navpress. Kindle Edition.  

In Case You've Caught the Mondays

Happy Monday everyone!

After two posts on Friday, I decided to take the weekend off from blogging. But don't worry, I have plenty to share today!

I will catch you up on my weekend really quickly (meh, kind of quickly).

Friday, I left work a little early because Jason and I had friends in town.

When I arrived home, a birthday/wedding present was waiting for me.

At first it was a mystery, and then on Saturday my sisters called and told me that the gift was from them! I love it (and so does Jason)!

We took our friends to New York Pizza, which was really fun. Jason and I just hung out for the rest of the evening.

Saturday was a busy day. We started out at the 5K Walk for Foster Care. I took us to the wrong park...oops! But once we got there, we had a great time. The weather was perfect and it was nice to start the day out early.

From there, we attempted to run some errands, but it honestly didn't happen. Everything we needed to do was closed. So...we went to lunch.

We hit up Stix by the Galleria thinking that they had a lunch menu, but they didn't. I got the teriyaki chicken with double veggies and no rice. I'm slowly but surely learning how to spell teriyaki (even though it's showing up as misspelled on my computer right now...uh oh).

Saturday was my sweet little neighbor's 87th birthday. Jason and I bought him a cupcake, card, plant, and balloon and left it for him Saturday morning. I ran into him as I was coming home from the grocery store on Saturday though and he said he didn't have dinner plans.

I was making dinner for Jason and myself, so I took some over to him.

Then...he told Jason that I need to go into the catering business.

Not sure what to think about that!

Anyway, here's what I made for dinner:

Jason's dinner is on top - Ziti Bake - and my sandwich and salad is below.

Once again, Jason and I ate together but separately. His dinner wasn't unhealthy, but I really wanted some frozen yogurt Saturday night, so I decided to use the remainder of the turkey from last week to make a sandwich.

I adapted the recipe for Jason's ziti bake from a recipe I found on Dashing Dish.

Three Cheese Ziti Bake (or, Three Cheese Pasta Bake):
Ingredients

• 3 c. cooked whole wheat penne pasta
• 1 c. fresh spinach leaves
• 1 lb. lean ground turkey
• 1.5 jars three cheese marinara sauce
• 2 oz. 1/3 less fat cream cheese, softened 
• 1 c. shredded mozzarella
• 1 tsp. basil
• 1 tsp. oregano 
• 1/2 tsp. salt
• 1/2 tsp. garlic powder
• 1/4 c. Parmesan cheese

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 375. Spray a large casserole dish with non-stick cooking spray. Cook pasta according to package directions.
2. Meanwhile cook ground turkey in a large nonstick skillet, until meat is cooked through, (no longer pink). Stir in cream cheese, crushed tomatoes, spinach, and spices and turn off heat. When pasta is done, pour into a colander to drain. Add pasta to sauce mixture.
3. Pour everything into prepared casserole dish, and sprinkle mozzarella over the pasta. Cover casserole dish with foil. Bake for 15 minutes, remove foil, and bake an additional 5-7 minutes, or until mozzarella is melted.

My sandwich consisted of whole wheat bread, an avocado, black forest turkey, and colby jack cheese. I grilled it on the skillet for a few minutes to melt the cheese.

I had a blast cooking Saturday night, as you can see. Usually, I'm alone on Saturday nights, so I either just make something quick for myself or go out to dinner with friends. Have I mentioned lately how much I love having Jason home?!? 

After dinner, Jason and I went to go see The Avengers...finally!! We are huge fans of the Edge Theater in Crestwood. We started going there when Sharing Spree sold tickets for less than $2. We bought tons of them...and unfortunately they're all used up/expired now. We still have coupons and Sharing Spree deals that are $5 for $10 worth of tickets or concessions. So, for two tickets and a popcorn, Jason paid the difference of $2 for us to see an incredible movie!! That's what I call a deal!

I loved everything about Saturday night. The food, the company, the movie, the price...absolutely everything...except for the kid who sat behind us in the movie and coughed, sneezed, and sniffled the ENTIRE 2.5 hour long movie! By the end of it, I felt like I needed to wash my hands for 15 minutes straight...or maybe take a shower.

Sunday was a normal Sunday for me. Jason went back to volunteering at church working the lights during all three services. I taught my 8th grade girls small group. We went home for lunch, ate leftovers, and watched Property Virgins. Then we went to the Summit to look for some colorful jeans for Jessica and we hit up Target on our way back to church. Church was great, our pastor and his wife are pregnant with their 4th child! We're so excited for them!

After church we went to Maki Fresh where I ordered a salmon salad. It was great, but I'm usually not all the way full after eating that. That shouldn't be the case for a salad that costs almost $10 from a counter-service restaurant. Oh well...

After church, Jason and I went home and read. We've never done that before and I'm not sure why. We both enjoy reading. So, we sat on my couch, Jason with book in hand and me with my Kindle. We read for about and hour...and then I fell asleep on the couch. Have I mentioned that Jason and I are glad we're done with school? I don't have the stamina to read like I had to in college anymore!

So, that about sums up my weekend. This morning I got up and went for a run around my apartment complex for about 30 minutes. I saw Jason's Asian next door neighbor doing tai chi or something in the parking lot.

GOAL: Get a picture of that for tomorrow's blog!

Also, isn't always more fun to get ready for a Monday with new things?

New matching red and black lunch box and tumbler.

QUESTION: Do you prefer a busy weekend or a laid back weekend at home?

Enough rambling for this Monday morning. Let us turn our focus to prayer...

Prayer Focus for the Day: May is National Foster Care Mother. Yesterday, the Alabama Baptist Children's Homes held their annual day of prayer. Will you join with me in praying for the fatherless both domestically and internationally? Here is a printable 40 day prayer guide: http://www.pearpod.com/oc/downloads/40DaysofPrayer.pdf

Both Ends of the Rainbow

Good morning everyone! Today is a special day...especially for me!

Today, I turn 23. It's the first of my "adult" birthdays. I know that people say that you're an "adult" when you turn 18, and then some people say you're an "adult" when you turn 21, but I don't believe any of that boondoggle. In my opinion, you're an "adult" when you go to work on your birthday.

Don't get me wrong, I could have asked off for today, but the truth is I kind of wanted to come to work. I have great friends at work and I love being around people on my birthday. It's also hard for me to take a lot of vacation days pre-wedding.

I even got some presents! Folger's Vanilla Biscotti, Summit gift card, cute earings, and a summer scarf!

I'm super blessed to have great friends at work.

I also realized this morning that this is the last  birthday that I'll ever have as Jessica Sansom. Next year, I'll be married woman and rockin' a new last name!

I'm super excited to celebrate with Jason and some more friends tonight! Stay tuned for that post tomorrow :)

Now it's time to backtrack to Saturday night-Sunday. I'm still trying to get my blogging schedule down pat, so you'll have to bear with me on the weekends for now.

Saturday night:

 I made some cookies to welcome Jason home and also to give to my sweet next door neighbor. Mr. Fritsch (my neighbor) is in his 80s and his wife just passed away a couple of months ago. I try to give him some sort of goodies and a note just to let him know that I'm thinking about him and praying for him whenever I can.

Cookies and Cream Cookies (recipe adapted from Lovin' from the Oven blog):

Yields 24 Cookies

Ingredients

• 1 stick softened margarine
• 6 Tablespoons Stevia in the Raw
• 6 Tablespoons brown sugar
• 2 egg whites
• 1 teaspoon vanilla
• 1 ¼ cup flour
• ½ teaspoon baking soda
• ½ teaspoon salt substitute
• 11 broken pieces Oreo Cookies
• 1 cup milk chocolate chips

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Cream butter, and sugars until well combined. Add egg and vanilla until mixed well.  
2. Place flour, baking soda and salt into a large bowl, stir to combine. Slowly add dry ingredients to wet ingredients then stir in the Oreos and chocolate chips until just combined. 
3. With a medium spoon, scoop onto baking sheet. Bake for 10 minutes or until cooked, but still soft.
4. Let cool on baking sheet for 3 minutes before transferring to cooling rack. 

Each cookie came in at about 56 calories. Not too shabby for a yummy treat!

The outcome = delicious 

Sunday:

The day had finally arrived. Jason was coming home for good! I woke up thinking that I was going to be late picking him up, but in actuality, I woke up about three hours too early. Oh well. Better early than late, right?

I took it slow, ate some breakfast (boiled egg), drank my coffee (yum), and did the 30 Day Shred (ouch). Then I hopped in the shower and headed to Montgomery where I was supposed to be meeting the buses. 

I arrived about 30 minutes before they did, so I hit up Ross Dress for Less. I had a successful little shopping trip. I walked out of there with a new welcome mat and wreath for the front door, a can opener, new lunch box, and a dress for less than $60. 

Finally, I got the call. The bus had decided to stop at a different exit, so they dropped Jason off at a Raceway gas station. A few minutes later, he was in my car and we were headed off to lunch!

We decided to get back on the road, so we stopped for lunch in Prattville. I was being a very indecisive eater, but we (I) finally settled on McAllister's Deli. 

Jason went with the French Dip with macaroni and cheese while I rocked the Veggie Club with fruit. 

When we finally made it back to Birmingham, we just relaxed and hung out. I couldn't believe that he was home for good and we didn't have to squish a whole week's worth of time together into two or three days. It was seriously so nice just to chill. 

After a little relaxing, we got ready for church. While we were driving there, we came across the most amazing rainbow I've ever seen. 

It looked like we could see the beginning of it and we drove under its perfect arch. I was just reminded of God's promises, which I know might be a bit cliche, but who cares. We serve a Savior who is faithful to the promises in his Word. 

Birmingham rainbow - the beginning

I sent a picture to my sister Carlee, and she sent this back to me.

Destin rainbow - the ending

We were five hours away from each other, but connected by rainbows. God is truly amazing.

At church, I felt so blessed to be able to dive into God's word specifically referring to a place where I am in life. The sermon was on Matthew 19, which is primarily about divorce. But, being engaged, it was necessary to truly listen and get everything I could out of it because to be divorced, you have to first be married. The whole entire sermon I kept thinking to myself, "I must be a wife who depends on solely on the Lord. My marriage must reflect Christ."

 I've heard him say it multiple times, but when David Platt said, "Take heed lest you fall," it pierced my heart like never before.

After church we grabbed dinner with  some friends who we haven't spent a lot of time with lately. It was so wonderful to reconnect with them! 

When we got home, Jason came over for a little bit. We had so much fun just talking and laughing. Like I said, it's really nice to just be able to hang out and relax. I don't like feeling rushed. 

Welp, that's about it as far as my weekend goes.

I did find out this fun fact today: 

Yes, while this was happening, I was being born. What a wonderful day May 7, 1989 truly was :)

Instead of rambling on, I'll leave you with a gift...

For all of you fellow Nutella lovers, here you go.

Day 2: Veggies in my Belly

Two days down and five more to go!

Before I get started on my day two stories, I wanted to go back to day one for just a moment. First, I weighed myself this morning and I was two pounds lighter than I was at the beginning of day one.  YAY! I've been keeping track of my calories on myfitnesspal.com. I'm keeping track more just out of curiosity. If I go over my calorie intake for the day, I still eat as long as I'm hungry (best part about the cleanse thus far). Yesterday my calorie intake was over by about 100 calories. I still continued eating though because, as you remember, I got really weak toward the end of the night.

Now, onto day two!

This morning I woke up and had mentally prepared myself to eat veggies for breakfast. I ended up eating a cucumber and drinking some herbal tea. I had some time to kill before church, which was good because I really needed to prepare for the eighth grade small group I teach on Sunday mornings. It was a beautiful morning, so I opened up the sliding glass door and window and enjoyed the cool breeze as I drank my tea and ate my cucumbers.  

Cucumbers and tea. A combination I never thought I'd eat for breakfast.

I headed off to church to teach my lovely eighth grade girls small group. Side note: We discussed how we love God today. So to go along with that lesson, I had my girlies take the 5 Love Languages assessment. I am Words of Affirmation first but followed by one point, I'm Quality Time. 

When I got home, I made myself a lovely lunch. Today called for a potato. I didn't want to spend time cooking a potato, so I went through the drive though at Wendy's to get a plain baked potato. I also stopped at Whole Foods on my way home and some garden vegetable hummus to accompany my raw veggies. Funny contrast between the Whole Foods bag and the Wendy's bag. 

I tore into that potato like nobody's business. And there's the Hunger Games cup!

Lunch:

2 c. of Spinach Leaves

1/2 Avacado

1/2 Squeezed Lemon

1 Plain Baked Potato

1 tsp. of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter

I had to snack a lot this afternoon. I spent some time chopping and sautéing some zucchini and yellow squash. 

Perfect colors for a beautiful day.

I also made some tea. 

About an hour later, I was ready for another snack. This time it was celery and my veggie hummus.

Snack two and three. I didn't eat all of the celery. I just cut all of it for the week at one time.

Then about an hour later I was getting ready to leave for church, and so I ate another snack. Yummy green beans with a little bit of salsa mixed in for a kick. 

Around 5:00 I headed out the door for church, again. I had a couple of errands to run on my way there, but I ended up only being able to cross one off my list before church. Oh well...

I made another stop at Walmart on my way home from church. I think I have everything for the rest of the week, but this is really getting kind of expensive. I haven't spent any more on food this week than I normally spend, but if I have to go to the store again, I'll be over budget. On the bright side, this cleanse is so strict that it doesn't allow me to eat out at all, so it all balances out.

I also got a lampshade for my new garage sale lamp! I'll post a picture tomorrow hopefully.

I finally got home tonight around 8:30. I was hungry, but I wasn't starving, which was a surprisingly good feeling. After last night I was really afraid I would be about ready to pass out on my way home from church. For dinner, I made a modified version of my lunch salad. Unfortunately, I couldn't eat another potato. 

Green goodness. 

Dinner:

1 c. Spinach Leaves

1 c. Chopped Kale

1/2 Avacado

1/2 Squeezed Lemon

5 Cucumber Slices

1/2 c. Mild Salsa

I haven't had to eat anything else tonight, which is pleasantly surprising. I spent the remainder of my evening cutting up fruits and preparing for work tomorrow. 

So far, I haven't been tempted to cheat, but I am afraid that I will now that the work week is beginning. I'm trying to be as prepared as possible. It should be relatively easy tomorrow, but I worry about day four and five since I'm limited in what I'm able to eat. I'm really just worried about being hungry, but I think by then my body will be used to this...I hope. 

Here's my calorie count for today. Veggies are definitely less calories. 

So, goodnight all. Goodnight blogisphere. Tomorrow I get fruits AND veggies! Hooray!

Chasing Rabbits

You're probably thinking, "Great, 'chasing rabbits' is just another way to say I'm going to ramble on and on and on. I think I'll skip out on this post." And you're probably right. But, the story I'm about to tell did happen on Easter weekend, and it's just poetic irony that I'm could potentially define the meaning of "chasing rabbits" in this blog post. But please, read on! This is my most exciting post yet. And you never know, it could end up being short and sweet :) ...but probably not.

The day before Easter, Jason worked in our hometown. He travels with Casting Crowns doing their merchandise and they were playing at the local arena here in Birmingham. I was so excited because it was the first Saturday we've been in the same town since we've been engaged. I packed a bag full of snacks and different weighted cardigans and I headed up to the BJCC where the concert would be taking place that night.

I tried to strategically arrive when Jason was ending the set up process (Sidenote: If you are going to a concert in the future, please appreciate all of the crew members and band members that make it possible. They were 12-16 hour days to make the experience perfect for you and they usually don't get to have their families with them).  So I arrived around lunchtime and just kind of hung around until it was time to go eat.

Over the last year and a half, I've become pretty familiar with a lot of the guys Jason tours with. So as we walked around we said hi to people, we (but mainly I) got asked how the wedding planning was going, and I just had a nice time getting to see everyone Jason lives with out on the road.

After lunch, we returned to the arena and Jason took my purse to the crew dressing room so I didn't have to lug it around with me all day. While I was waiting for him, I was leaning up against a wall just kind of halfway paying attention to what was going on around me.

The security woman who works for the building was sitting there by the backstage/dressing room area entrance. She was very friendly and heard us talking about eating at Surin West (our favorite little Thai place downtown). We'd gone there for lunch, but I guess she assumed we were from out of town and we hadn't eaten yet. She offered me a BOGO coupon for Surin, which was so thoughtful. I told her that we actually live in Birmingham, and I had the same coupon that we were able to use for our lunch. She said that Jason looked familiar, then Jason came out of his dressing room, I said thank you for the coupon offer, and we went on our way. Little did I know, my interaction with her was just beginning.

Later that afternoon, Jason and I walked by the same security guard and there was another crew guy talking to her. Jason leaned over and whispered to me, "I bet he's sharing the gospel with her." I asked why he thought that and this is how he responded: "He shares the gospel with at least one person every day."

My response: "I need to be more like that guy."

His name was John Fry. He's an older-teenager who travels with the band and just loves sharing the gospel with people that he meets on the road. 

A little while later, Jason and I were going to go get coffee so I needed my purse. While I was waiting outside of the dressing room again, John Fry was still talking to the security guard. She seemed so engaged and was asking questions. I was trying not to creep on the conversation too much, but I really wanted to just stand there and listen. About a minute later, the security guard's relief came and she went on her break.

I stood there as John Fry walked around the corner and waiting for her to come back. I stood there and prayed that she would receive the truth that John Fry was telling her and the she would come to know Jesus as her Savior right then and there. I teared up and had to stop myself from crying. I could feel how powerful the Word of God is while I was just standing there.

Well, Jason came out of his dressing room and we walked back up to the merch booth.

A few hours passed and Jason got radioed to come down to the side of the stage during the show. So we walked down there and one of the other crew members asked if we could meet this woman who John Fry shared the gospel with. She had just become a believer! They wanted to introduce Jason and me to her officially since we're local and we're plugged in to a local church. Jason sent me up to get some CDs for her and a few minutes later we were introducing ourselves, talking about churches in the area, talking about concerts and her job, and finally, I gave her my phone number.

I told her that she better call me. She is single and she said that she just needs friends to do things with. I explained to her that I live here and my fiancé travels for work so I'm alone a lot too. I've been praying for her, and I hope so badly that she calls!

The next morning Jason and I met at my car to go to church. This was my first holiday away from home, and I was nervous about being lonely. Even though Jason and I would be together I was worried because I'm from a large family so holidays are big events for us. So, to ensure that Jason and I would not be lonely, and to serve our church, I volunteered us to help with the preschoolers during church.

Jason and I were ready for the three-year-old class that we were assigned to. We had the craft ready, our Spring colors on, and we had read over all of the material. When we arrived, there was one kid to every adult, so we got sent to the baby room.

Now, Jason is an only child. And even though I'm the oldest child and have younger siblings, they're in high school. I've done some baby sitting here and there over the years, but not very recently. I'm sure that when we walked in the door to the baby room, our two sets of eyes looked like big brown golf balls.

I'm pretty sure Jason has never held a baby before. As soon as we walked in, they made Jason a "walker". That meant that he walked a stroller with two babies in it around the lobby area so that they wouldn't cry. Jason gladly accepted so that he had a job to do, but that also meant that if anything went wrong, he was all alone.

I stayed behind to help the other volunteers. I offered to make a bottle for one of the babies, but I made it wrong. It seemed like every time I held a baby, they cried. It didn't take long before I became a walker too (now that I think about it, they made me a walker after I told them Jason and I are engaged and we do not have kids).

All in all, being with the babies was a great experience. We got to serve our church. We got to play with babies. And we realized that we definitely want to wait a little while before we have our own babies.

We ended our independent Easter by attended the evening service at church. How incredible it was to worship our Savoir after such an eventful weekend!

Although we didn't partake in any of the usual Easter "festivities", I truly believe that our weekend was better for it. We were able to serve the Lord this holiday weekend and focus on His Son and what He did for us on the cross.

So,  no we did not end up chasing rabbits this weekend, but we do know that at least one person is no longer running. 

GO: Beyond Comfort

A little over a month ago I sent a letter to two members of my extended family. This letter was prompted by watching a complete stranger share his testimony and get baptized at church one Sunday evening. I believe it was also prompted by a unrest, or stirring in my soul to that would not subside until I reached out to these two people whom I love dearly.

The letter basically was asking about their salvation. I have grown up around these two individuals, but yet I'd never heard them say anything about salvation, God, being a believer, etc. Other than the occasional update that included involvement at church, God was not a topic that we really had discussed.

For the majority of my life, I always assumed that if someone went to church and was overall a "good" and "decent" person, they were a Christian. Even after I became a believer in 2009, the optimist within me wanted to believe that every smiling face I saw on Sunday mornings I would also spend eternity with. Through various conversations, prayer, and much contemplation, I realized that my thought process on this matter was probably a little backward.

I don't know the theology behind what to assume about someone you see in church, or if we should even assume anything about the state of someone's salvation, but one question I needed answered was this: If I assume that everyone I see at church, or that I know goes to church, is already a believer, am I doing them a disservice by failing to share the gospel with them? The answer I landed on: Yes.

Growing up in a small-ish town in Northwest Florida (or as we like to call it, L.A. which stands for "Lower Alabama"), I was surrounded by a lot of church-goin' people. When I went off to college, I was landed right in the heart of the bible belt in Birmingham, Alabama at a baptist university. I was blessed to attend such a wonderful university, but let's be honest, just about every new student had previously received the most involved superlative from their youth group back home and they were determined to receive the same award from whatever college ministry they got involved in. Honestly, that was one of my favorite things about college, so I'm not bashing it at all, but there is definitely good and bad that come with both of the cultures I've been engrossed in.


It is no secret that the Southeastern region of the United States is full of church-goin', God-lovin' people. The problem is that when we're immersed in such a culture, it's hard to distinguish who is truly a believer and who needs to hear and experience the gospel of Jesus Christ.


Such was the case with the two family members that I sent a letter to. Thankfully, I was able to talk to them in person about all of this about two weeks ago. Walking into a home that I am so familiar with and knowing that there was a very good chance I could thoroughly offend people who are so dear to me was extremely scary. But I just kept reminding myself that it's because they are so dear to me that I knew I couldn't avoid the topic.


As I reflect on this experience, I have zero regret. I still am not necessarily satisfied with the response that I got from my family members, but I did have the opportunity to share my testimony and the truth of the gospel with them.

May you, as a reader, be encouraged to speak truth into people each day. Whether they have believed in the gospel of Jesus Christ or if they have not, speak truth to them. Hopefully, if they already have a relationship with Christ, they will be encouraged and reminded of our mission in this world; if they don't, well, that's why we're here.  

"Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age."  - Matthew 28:19-20

We are to go.

Go to our families, our friends, our co-workers,  our church members, and even to strangers.

Go to our work place, our communities, our homes, and to the nations.

May your life and mine be for the glory of God.