Numbers are Cotton-Headed-Ninny-Muggins

I'm not a numbers person. I'm really just not. In my opinion, number are better left in the hands of "numbers people" and I do not qualify as one of those people. By the way, the title is not calling "numbers people" Cotton-Headed-Ninny-Muggins - I've just really had an urge to watch Elf all week.

Going through this weight loss journey, my worst fear is gaining back weight that I've lost, not losing any weight, or really not losing "enough" at a time. If I'm eating right and working out but I am not losing weight on a scale or only like 1/2 a pound at a time, it makes me want to ask, "What's the point?"

Anyone else ever feel that way?

But if I lost 6 lbs. in 24 days, that means that I lost 2/3 of a pound a day. Over time, that adds up...it just may not look that way on the scale.

Before I began this journey, I read a book called Made to Crave. I totally recommend it to anyone and everyone. This is what she says about weight-in day:

Define your week by obedience, not by a number on the scale. The scale does help measure our progress, but it can’t tell us everything. It can’t tell us if the problem is too much salt intake that is making us retain a pound or two of water. It can’t tell us if we actually lost a pound of fat but gained more muscle from weight training. And (in my case this week), it can’t tell us what time of the month it is and then give us automatic credit for the extra two pounds or so those glorious few days bring to us.

So, I had to stop and ask myself the following questions:

• Did I overeat this week on any day?

• Did I move more and exercise regularly?

• Do I feel lighter than I did at this time last Wednesday?

• Did I eat in secret or out of anger or frustration?

• Did I feel that, at any time, I ran to food instead of to God?

• Before I hopped on the scale, did I think I’d had a successful, God-pleasing week?

So, why oh why do I get so tied up in a stupid number? And why did I almost let it trip me up and send me to the kitchen for a 750-calorie binge? (Don’t worry. I had a yogurt and tea instead.) Sweet friends, we need to define ourselves by our obedience, not a number on the scale. Okay? Pinky promise? Good. We are all in this thing together. And we will get the weight off, even if it is 1.8 pounds at a time!

I've started a new tradition where I read this after I weigh-in - and it really does help. I also have the bullet points printed out and taped to my bathroom mirror. I asked myself these questions and give a verbal answer (I guess that means I do talk to myself after all).

If you struggle at all with what the scale says, do this, and make sure that you're stepping on the scale with a mindset of obedience rather than getting caught up silly numbers.

Now, onto something else -

I'm totally obsessed with some new music...well maybe not new, but newer and new to me.

The album I'm currently obsessed with is Ron Weasley's Ed Sheeran's "+". I totally jam out to it almost everyday on the way to work right now. Just a disclaimer, he's British, so you have to beware of the language. He doesn't use bad language in a demeaning or derogatory way, he just kinda slips it in there. I don't condone it, but I really like his music.

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Buy Ed's album on iTunes here.

Little interesting fact: Ed has actually written songs for/with One Direction. He's a brilliant songwriter (image me saying the last sentence with a British accent).

That's about all I have for today, folks.

What kind of filter are you using?

I keep being drawn back to this idea of filtering. In fact, last night Jason and I even had to go buy a new water filter for our fridge (ours was a casualty of last week's fridge fiasco). Many times, God uses repetition to get our attention. So, when I kept hearing the same phrase used over and over again, I knew that I needed to apply it to my life out of obedience.

When I was reading Made to Crave this excerpt from chapter 14 really stuck out to me:

"What about you? Do you have something from your past that causes emotional emptiness? As a first step toward healing, can you think of one thing good from this past situation? Or maybe something good that has happened despite the pain from the event? If not, ask God to give you some good place to park your mind with this draining issue from your past. Then, try walking through the following exercise based on Philippians 4:8.
Whatever is true...
Whatever is noble...
Whatever is right...
Whatever is pure...
Whatever is lovely...
Whatever is admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy...
Piece by piece, God has created a mosaic in my heart—one of restoration, healing, and compassion. I am the person I am today in part because of the hurt of being left behind by my dad. I wouldn’t have chosen that piece of my mosaic, but how good of God to place right beside the hurt a clear piece of glass shaped like those warm icicles from so long ago. A memory I can think on. A memory that fills me better than any piece of chocolate cake or nacho chips. A memory that is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. And filling."

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So, I finished that book and about a week later I attended the women's workshop at church. When talking about renewing our minds, this is what I learned:

Step 1: Remember the ABC...
Actuating Event - things that we cannot control; triggers that cause tough emotions to flair up; "pop ups" like from AOL in 1999
Beliefs/Thoughts about the Event - we recognize more of the emotions rather than the actual belief
Consequences of Those Beliefs - emotions; physical actions; what stems from these thoughts?
Disputing False Beliefs with the truth - know the truth; know God's Word; identify the truth based on God's Word
Effect New Consequences - emotions that are manifested out of the knowledge of the truth from God's Word

Step 2: Identify...
What are my emotions? Are they true?

Step 3: Filter...
Philippians 4:8 test - Is it [my emotions or my feelings that are troubling] true? Is it honorable? Is it just? Is it pure? Is it lovely? Is it commendable? Is it excellent? Is it worthy of praise?

Step 4: Replace...
If the answer to the above question is "no", then take off the "old self" and put on "new self" (Colossians 3:9-10). Be ready with weapons to replace your "old self" (aka God's Word).

Step 5: Accountability...
We cannot renew our minds by yourself. Surround yourself with people who are encouragers, not discouragers. Surround yourself with people who will speak truth into your life.

As I mentioned in my Mad Men post from yesterday, about 24 hours after this workshop, I was sitting on my couch watching TV Sunday night when I started to feel sick to my stomach. I thought about the "Philippians 4:8 Filter". I knew the verse, but I'd never heard it called that before. Then, in two weeks, it was being brought to my attention over and over. So, I took the hint and went through it.

Is this show true? No. It's not real life. Real life probably never has to will look like this.
Is this show honorable? No. As how that allows infidelity to be okay is not honorable to my husband. It's polluting my mind.
Is it just? No. He never gets caught. Or his wife is just okay with it. That's stupid. Both of them are stupid.
Is it pure? No way. This isn't hard. Adultery in any form is not pure - EVER.
Is it lovely? No, it's making me sick just watching it.
Is it commendable? No. No explanation needed.
Is it excellent? No. See above.
Is it worthy of praise? No. Not by me. Maybe some crazy gross men would think so, but according to God's Word, the only thing that I should praise are things that are given by God. Adultery is the opposite.

Thus yesterday's blog post was written.

So, that all seems kind of obvious, right? Like, it's not hard to figure out that if your mind is being effected by something that is externally being put into it, like a TV show, then turn the TV show off. But, what about things that are internally polluting our mind? How are we supposed to renew our minds and filter through the good and the bad in those circumstances?

The same way.

For example, I really want a house. Jason and I live in an apartment now, and it's a great apartment but I just really am tired of living there and I want a house. But, we've only been married for seven months, we're both just beginning our careers, and houses are a huge and an expensive investment.

So, how to I filter through my obsession of driving through neighborhoods almost on a daily basis and getting the "gimme wants"?

Yeah, I have 146 pins for what I want in a home.
It's not something I'm proud of.
Look at this board here.

Is this show true? Yes, eventually Jason and I will buy a house...Lord willing.
Is this show honorable? Yes. We want to buy a house big enough for the family we dream of having someday.
Is it just? Yes. Maybe not right now - it's not justifiable - because we still have time left on our lease and we're in the middle of saving for a down payment.
Is it pure? Yes and no. Yes, I want a house because I want to fill both extra bedrooms with a child someday. No, right now we don't NEED it and I really would like to have a house because that's what I want. I want more space. I was to show it off. I want others to come over and say, "Oh you have such a beautiful house!"
Is it lovely? Yes. After I finish decorating. Just kidding. But yes, buying a home with my husband with the money that God has blessed us with is a lovely thing...in His timing.
Is it commendable? Yes. It's a huge step forward. It's a huge investment. To be able to purchase a home is utilizing the blessings that God has given us with our jobs and our ability to manage and save money well.
Is it excellent? Yes. I hope so.
Is it worthy of praise? Again, yes and no. Yes, we will absolutely praise God for our home. I am confident that He will provide. But no, we don't deserve praise for it - it will truly be a gift from God.

Based on that, if I were someone else looking at my answers, I'd tell me that my obsession with buying a house isn't unhealthy, but I probably need to dial it down until the time comes. I need to renew my mind to focus on having contentment in our apartment and in this place of not having the responsibility of being a homeowner. That gives us more time without the financial pressures just to grow in our marriage.

So I ask you today, what kind of filter are you using? Are there things in your life that you need to put through the Philippians 4:8 Filter? Do you need to renew your mind, your heart, and/or your spirit? Is there something that is keeping you down, causing a pit in your stomach that you can't quite put your finger on, that needs to be dealt with?

Put it through the filter. Let the Lord work on you. Surround yourself with those who are encouraging and not discouraging. Spend time allowing truth to saturate your mind. Spending time in communication with Christ today.

Day 1: Reminiscing & the Weekend

Verse of the Day - Day 1: "Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the
world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride of life—is not from the Father but is from the world." - 1 John 2:15-16

Well, my weekend got off to a great start...and it just kind of stayed in this state of awesome greatness. Jason works a lot of weekends, but every three weeks or so we get a weekend off together. This was one of those weekends and it did not disappoint.

Friday we saw my favorite band at the Boutwell Auditorium. Before the show, we ate at the Bottega Cafe - which was a new experience for me. I've eaten at Bottega once before, but that was when I was still in high school and visiting Samford. Then we went to the Needtobreathe show, and we even ran into some friends! This was my third time seeing them live, and Jason's fifth. Interestingly enough, they're MY favorite band, not his. Hehe, guess he'll have to keep taking me every time they're close by ;-)

Jason & I between sets

Needtobreathe

My new hoodie.

Saturday Jason drove me around what is now my "dream" neighborhood (emphasis on the dream). We also loaded up on fruits and veggies for this week! Yay for Aldi. We only spent $56 and that included some normal food for Jason. That night we ordered Tazikis to go, stayed at home, and watched The Impossible - which was super intense but good. I can't believe Anne Hathaway won Best Supporting Actress over Naomi Watts. Nothing personal Anne, Naomi was just that good. We also caught up on some of our TV shows, one being Person of Interest. When we were in NYC, we saw them filming an episode and we were about three feet away from Jim Caviezel (aka John Reese on POI and Jesus in The Passion of the Christ) and Michael Emerson (aka Harold Finch on POI and Ben Linus on LOST). Well, this past Thursday, "our" episode was on! We finally got to watch it on Saturday and we literally both freaked out!

If you own this house, I'll be your best friend forever if you sell it to the Morales' for $10.

Cleanse groceries.

The top picture is what we saw in NYC. The bottom picture is what was on TV Thursday.

Sunday we went to church, relaxed, and then went to a wedding to see one of my friends from work get married. I spent a little bit of time answering the "Personal Reflection" questions in the Made to Crave book (which I finished on Friday...YAY). In keeping with vunerablity throughout this process on my blog, I wanted to share this with my blog readers. I hope and pray that maybe just one person can halfway identify with me on this.

Question: What fantasies do you have about what life would be like if you were at your ideal weight? Do you imagine everything in your life would somehow be better—your relationships would improve, your confidence would soar, your problems would fall away, you’d be respected, admired, obeyed? Why do you think your weight has so much power to influence your outlook on life?

My Answer: "I think that I've always thought that if I were skinnier I'd have more friends, find a really great and good looking guy who would want to date me, get a super awesome dream job, and have better relationships with those who are currently in my life. But now that I'm married to the perfect guy for me, and I'm not skinnier, I know that skinny does not equal happy. Even though I may not be happy with myself, I am more than happy - in fact I'm overjoyed - with the life that God has given me. My weight battle is now more about loving myself and being confident in who God made me to be. I feel like my weight holds me back from accomplishing things that He may be calling me to do - not physically, but emotionally, mentally, and spiritually (I know that I'm not obese or even really fat...I'm just uncomfortable). I want to find my worth in Him and follow ANYTHING He calls me to do. I've found that being married and still being my version of overweight, I find a lot of my self worth through the eyes of my husband...which I think is good in many ways...but I want to find ALL of my self worth and confidence in Christ - internally and externally."

I'm not sure how well I actually answered the question, but those thoughts have been on my heart for a while so it felt good to get them all out.

This morning I got up at the normal time, made a juice, and packed an ice chest (yes, I have an ice chest at my desk today) full of fruit.

1 Granny Smith Apple, 1 Kiwi, Some green grapes.

Please excuse the piled dishes. We were in a hurry this morning. Ahh...Mondays.

My bag-o-fruit to take to work. It's a few layers deep.

My goal is to write a blog post that will go up before lunchtime that gives an overview of the previous day and the prep for the current day.

A few things to know if you're doing the cleanse along with me:

1. You can't have coffee. Now, I don't really use super bad stuff in my coffee, or at least I don't have to. I can do black coffee with a little skim milk and Splenda, so there may be a day that I have to break down and drink a bit of "gray" coffee. Tea is a great alternative in the mornings.
2. After day one and two, you may feel a little "swimmy headed". I honestly don't know how else to describe it. This went away for me after the first few days once my body got over the shock that I was actually eating natural foods. 
3. If you're hungry, you need to eat. Maybe eat a little something every 90 minutes or so.
4. Drink LOTS of water.
5. Stick to the plan as best as possible. This is done best by not putting yourself in temptation of breaking the plan. Don't go "sit" with your bestie at Pizza Hut, it won't go well. 
6. Don't try to exercise. If you do, go for a brisk walk or something, but don't try to do heavy weightlifting or intense running or anything. 
7. The recipe soup on Day 7 makes a TON. I actually didn't buy stuff for it because last time I ended up throwing a lot of it out. I may end the cleanse at lunchtime on Day 7 this time because I got really really weak on this day last time. After eating protein for a few days, it was really tough to go back to eating only veggies at the end of this. So, I think I'm just going to make about 1/4 of what the recipe calls for and then I'll eat protein at dinner.
8. Don't try to eat anything fried for a few weeks after the cleanse. It will make your tummy feel verdy uncomfortable. 
9. Get lots of sleep! 
10. Pray through this thing! Cleanse your body of toxins, sugars, and bad things, but also cleanse your heart of the nasty-ness that clogs it up on a daily basis.

If you have questions, please feel free to blogbacktome by commenting below or sending me an email! Thanks in advance for the prayers and encouragement :) 

That's all for Day 1 folks.
I've blogged to you...
Now you can blogbacktome

Eat Your Heart Out

Remember last year when I did the cleanse before I went wedding dress shopping? Well, I'm going to do it again - minus the wedding dress shopping.

I've almost finished Made to Crave (I took on another book while I was reading this one, so it's taken me longer to finish it) and I feel as though the Lord is prompting me to do something drastically obedient.

Interestingly enough, I just finished reading all of the laws that God gave to Moses about what the Israelites could and couldn't eat, about their sacrifices, and how they are to conduct their lives as God's chosen people.

I don't believe in coincidences, but I believe in answered prayers. I feel like everything that I've been reading, praying, learning, talking about, and writing about is all coming together - converging roads if you will. I know that God has allowed me to come to this place in what I'm learning because I've been begging Him to teach me.

This is how I feel.
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Teach me to trust.

Teach me to be obedient.

Teach me to crave His glory.

Teach me dependence.

Teach me to pray.

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These have been my prayers over the last four weeks or so, and God has been faithful to answer each of them. I'm on a journey - and if you've read my blog for any length of time, you know that.

I've always tried to be healthier to lose weight. While I still want to achieve a healthier life and I'd love to fit into my old jeans from college, this is the FIRST time that I'm doing this as a spiritual journey in which I am more focused on what God wants to do inside of my heart.

As I did last time, I'm going to attempt to blog about my cleanse each day. You can read the posts from my first cleanse here:

Preparing for the cleanse

Day 1: Fruit

Day 2: Veggies

Day 3: Fruits and Veggies

Day 4: Bananas and Milk/Yogurt

Day 5: Thoughts so far

Day 5: Poultry and Tomatoes

Day 6: Poultry and Veggies

Day 7: Weird Soup

I will begin on Monday, April 8th and, Lord willing, end on Sunday, April 14th. I really liked the "Modified GM Cleanse" (or the "Eat Your Heart Out" diet) so I'm going to stick with that. If anyone would like to do it with me, I'm posting the plan below for you to reference. I would ask this though: If you're planning on doing this cleanse as well, please let me know so that we can encourage each other along the way. Just send me an email or text so that I know :)

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Please be in prayer for me as I prepare for this cleanse and as I embark on this challenge. Pray that the Lord would be faithful to allow me to forget my hunger and cravings for delicious sugary foods and yummy crunchy, salty snacks. I'd also love encouragement along the way. If you think about out, a little shout out of encouragement would be a wonderful gift to receive next week.

Alright, that's all of today.

Thanks for reading!

Have a good weekend everyone!

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